There's nothing quite like the feeling of your baby snuggled up against you during a contact nap. The cuddles, their sweet little face and that overwhelming love - these moments are some of the most precious parts of motherhood. 💕

But let's be honest, sometimes a contact nap can also feel like you're trapped, especially when your to-do list is a mile long.

As a midwife and a mum who has spent a whole lot of time trapped under a sleeping baby, I want to answer some of the most common questions about contact naps - so you can enjoy the snuggles, look after yourself and know what's normal along the way.

In this post, you'll discover:

• What a contact nap actually is
• The benefits of contact napping
• Whether contact naps create bad sleep habits
• Why your baby might only want to sleep on you
• The downsides of contact napping (and what to do if you feel touched out)
• Tips to make contact naps easier
• How to contact nap with a baby carrier

What is a contact nap?

A contact nap is when your baby has a sleep while being held or close to you. They may be breastfeeding or just snuggling into you.

It can be one of the sweetest parts of the newborn days and there are some beautiful benefits that come with it.

The benefits of contact napping

✔️ Bonding time: there's no better way to soak in those newborn snuggles and strengthen your connection with your baby.

✔️ Comfort for your baby: your baby feels safe and secure hearing your heartbeat and feeling your warmth.

✔️ Helps with sleep: many babies settle faster and sleep longer when they're close to you.

✔️ Promotes oxytocin: the love hormone flows for both of you, supporting your emotional wellbeing and even helping with breastfeeding.

Will contact naps create bad sleep habits?

No, you will not be creating bad sleep habits. Your baby will not be 18 and contact napping, I promise! They will eventually settle to sleep in their cot or bed.

Babies crave connection and closeness. It's how they build their attachment and how they feel safe. They are programmed to want and need to be close to you for survival.

So when your baby wants to be held to sleep, they are doing exactly what babies are designed to do.

Why does my baby only sleep on me?

Being close to you is where your baby feels safest. That need for closeness is wired into them from the very beginning.

This closeness often helps them to sleep for longer too. Your baby may wake for a short period to check that you are still there and then go straight back to sleep.

The downsides of contact napping

Contact naps can be beautiful, but they aren't always easy.

❌ Feeling trapped: it can be tough to get things done when you're stuck under a sleeping baby.

❌ Feeling touched out: constant closeness can sometimes feel overwhelming, especially if you're not getting much personal space.

❌ Dependency concerns: some parents worry contact naps will create habits that make it hard for their baby to sleep independently later. (This is a myth!)

❌ Physical discomfort: staying in one spot for long periods can lead to sore muscles or back pain, especially if you're not in a good position.

What if I feel touched out or nap trapped?

My goodness, I so get this feeling.

My first baby was very unsettled and loved to be close. I spent the first year of his life holding him, having him in the carrier or contact napping.

This was really challenging for me. I'm someone who loves a to-do list and I held myself to an insanely high standard. When I was nap trapped for long periods, I couldn't stop thinking about all the things I wanted to get done and how I couldn't do them because I was stuck in the one spot.

It can be especially challenging if you are breastfeeding. Between feeding your baby and holding them to sleep, that connection can feel constant, like they are on you 24/7.

If that's you right now, here's what helped me:

✔️ Time: knowing that it will not last forever, even though it feels like it in the moment.

✔️ Asking for help: have someone else settle your baby to sleep so you get a break.

✔️ Connecting in other ways: when your baby is awake, consider some floor play or activities that don't require you to be holding your baby, so you are still connecting and playing with them.

✔️ Small ways to calm down: I'm not talking about doing a 20 minute meditation session every time you feel overstimulated, because we don't have time for that! Just 1–5 minute things you can add in to help calm your nervous system and regulate in the moment, like calming music, self soothers, deep breaths or grounding exercises.

Needing a break from being touched is okay. It's a sign you need some care too.

Tips to make contact naps easier

✔️ Create a comfortable space: set up pillows, blankets and your essentials (snacks, water, headphones and a phone charger) so it's cosy for you too.

✔️ Stay productive (if you want to!): if you feel like getting things done, try catching up on messages, planning what you will have for dinner, delegating tasks to loved ones or even doing some online grocery shopping.

✔️ Try babywearing: if your baby loves the closeness while they sleep but you want to be hands-free, pop them in a carrier for their nap. You can move around freely while still keeping them close.

✔️ Embrace the rest: not every moment has to be productive. Let yourself relax, listen to a podcast or just enjoy the cuddles. Remember, this is your time to rest and recharge too.

✔️ Keep safe sleep in mind: if you are feeling tired and worried you may fall asleep while your baby contact naps, it is best to try and put them on a separate safe sleep surface, or start the contact nap in a location that is set up for safer co-sleeping. For more information, see Red Nose safe sleep guidance.

Can I contact nap with a baby carrier?

Absolutely! A carrier can be a great way to promote that closeness and help your baby fall asleep, while also helping you be hands-free and get some jobs done (if you want to!).

You could always go for a walk with the carrier on to get some movement and fresh air too.

Whenever you use a carrier, remember your TICKS:

• Tight: the carrier should be tight enough to hug your baby close to you
• In view at all times: you should always be able to see your baby's face by simply glancing down
• Close enough to kiss: your baby's head should be close enough to your chin that you can kiss the top of their head
• Keep chin off the chest: make sure there is space under your baby's chin, about a finger width
• Supported back: your baby's back should be supported in a natural position, with their tummy and chest against you

Read this blog for more info

Final thoughts: finding your balance with contact naps

Some days you'll be all-in for snuggle time. Other days you'll crave a bit of freedom and both are okay.

I have been there and learning to find balance was a game-changer for me. A good carrier and a comfy setup made those first few months so much easier!

No matter what today looks like, whether you're ticking off your to-do list or soaking up every cuddle, you're doing an amazing job 💕

Is your little one a contact napper? Tell me in the comments - I would love to hear what has helped you.

I'm here for you,

Tam xx